Gun control

There won’t be a change in gun control until a NASCAR event or Luke Bryan concert gets shot up.

You think people who cling to their guns care if a bunch of college students get murdered? With all their liberal queer learning and fancy space aged math and gay marriage cake baking classes. Colleges are just training camps, SET UP BY OBAMA,  to create democrats that want to take our guns , give our jobs to illegal immigrants and establish sharia law. If the good book learned us anything, it is that if Jesus would of been strapped to the gills with AK47s and deer scent pee he’d still be alive today ruling America with an iron fist.

Look at the “war on Christmas” and the attack on “tradition marriage”. People like that don’t pay attention unless you’re “taking something away from THEM”. I can promise you …. college isn’t a place of their concern.


Chip off the old block

Potato chips are no longer family size , they’re party size.

This is just one more step Obama has taken to destroy the core family. No more Sunday nights bonding over the bag of Lays. Now you get your potato chips at a rave where everyone is getting gay married. How am I supposed to explain party size to my child? Especially when he’s already eaten the entire bag. Thanks a lot Obama.

Rippity rapitty rap

Rap is one of the only where people like you for being an asshole.
Rappers are like “I’m the best at everything , look at all my money bitch ,
your life sucks” and people are like yeah you do you Kanye.
lf your boss came into work every day and was like IM YOUR BOSS BITCH!
Fill out this paper work chicken head!! Then made it rain documents all over the place… you’d quit.
Rapper does it …… number 1 song

Free Hugs

People have exploited tragedy in this country so much that America is numb.
It’s awful how mass shootings are just another thing now. Something you hear about , sigh , and continue on like it was someone tripping at an awards show.

I remember when Columbine happened the entire country froze.
It was like 9/11 ….. or Lebron going to Miami .
Now unless it’s a Division one school with a sports team with a legit shot at a title , no one gives a shit.
“There was Shooting at state? I’m not worried about it, they have a good recruiting class coming up.”

When Columbine happened and everyone blamed Marilyn Manson.
Now that hes been out of the spot light for a while now people want to blame guns , the actual inanimate object. I’m on board with stricter gun laws BUT ..
Can we finally start blaming shitty parents?
If a kid sees a gun on the counter and thinks …
“I was going to watch some Spongebob but …..ya know what would be fun , if i murdered a lot of people.”
That’s on the parents. They messed that up.

What I’m saying is parents …
Hug your kids enough to make them happy!

Or ignore them so much they dont have the self esteem to aim a gun but
this middle of the road bull shit isn’t working.

Movies Effect Real Life

Romantic comedies remind me that I need enough secondary characters in my life for groomsmen. They always have :
The Best man … best supporting actor.
Groomsmen 1 and 2 … main characters that helped the story line.
Groomsman 3 .. the wacky Taxi Driver from the opening credits .
I already tipped him , I don’t need to buy that asshole a plate of salmon

I think Movies have an effect on society …
After Top Gun came out applications for naval aviators went up 500%.
After 300 came out gym memberships went through the roof.
After Toy Story came out childhood schizophrenia tripled.
But it’s went too far!
With all these recent super hero movies coming out we have made a real life super villain …
Donald Trump.
Donald Trump is a hodgepodge of every villain in history.
He has giant base with his name on it, he’s racist and he’s using his cartoonish wealth and brain washing super powers to run for president.
And there’s no Avengers to stop him !
The only chance we have is being smart enough as a country to not vote for him…
so we’re fucked.
Donald Trump has hit the Michael Jackson realm of crazy where you believe everything you read about him no matter how ridiculous it is.
If you heard “Donald Trump slaughters 4000 hobbits in Narnia.”
You couldn’t even question it. You’d just have to say…
Did you hear Trump hates little people? That’s really going to hurt him in the polls.